“In my despair, I reluctantly accepted the burden of a marriage I had always feared”

“My name is Deeba and I’m 24 years old. I experienced a lot of trouble and violence in my family from an early age. My father abused my mother several times a day for no apparent reason. She endured all this pain as if she had no other choice. I always hid because I was afraid that my father would hurt me too. I even fell victim to his anger a few times and once, out of desperation, I thought about taking my own life. But my mother stopped me. 

Witnessing the distressing violence in my family, I made a solemn promise to myself: I would pursue an education and transform into a successful person. My determination was driven by a strong desire to change not only my own life but also to empower thousands of young girls facing similar struggles. The idea of marriage disgusted me. My sole ambition was to gain knowledge and excel in my studies to pass the challenging university entrance exam, the Konkur. 

Despite facing economic hardships and the discouraging negativity of society, I persisted. I walked four hours a day to reach the university because we couldn’t afford transportation, and I often skipped meals during my lunch break. Nevertheless, I persevered with unwavering determination. My dream felt within reach. 

But then, in my third year of university, the Taliban disrupted our lives. They barred girls from continuing their education. All my dreams and aspirations crumbled, and I felt like I was merely existing, not truly living. It was as if I had become an inanimate being navigating through an endless nightmare.  

One day, two Taliban members threatened me while I was with two other students. They were angry about my clothes, and when I tried to argue that God created us all as free beings, one of them raised a menacing weapon and threatened to snuff out my life. It was only thanks to my husband’s intervention that I was saved from this dangerous encounter. 

Today, I teach private courses from my home, in math and science, as I am determined to assist those girls who are denied an education. My dreams, while shaken, remain unbroken. Nothing, not even the institution of marriage or the oppressive regime of the Taliban, will deter me from my mission.